For some time now, I have not been able to truly find why I run. Why do I love doing this? It hurts. It sucks. Here I am killing myself pushing just under 100 lbs around on wheels for countless miles. There is no relief or release afterwards. There is absolutely nothing except the thought that at least that is over with. For today. Then I begin to grow weary and anxious regarding the run I have to do the next day.
There is just so much to it.
- Load the stroller into the truck
- Load the weather shield and blankets
- Make sure a kindle is charged, charge watch, charge bluetooth speaker
- Set out clothes...check the weather 14,436,697 times because I live in NC and it could be winter or summer the next morning
- Prepare hydration vest with water, clif shots, honeystinger waffle and inhaler
- Get to bed at a decent time...or whenever the children actually let you finish everything and get them to bed
- Now sleep...if you can, tomorrow will be as agonizing as today was.
Do you see my issue? I could not see it for months. There is too much. Too much of everything. Too little remembering that this is what I love. This weekend I angrily put on my running clothes, grabbed my watch and ipod. I HAD to go run. I did not want to. Stepped foot outside and said one thing whether it be true or not.
"I love running"
I set off down my normal route and by a quarter mile in I was already looking at my watch to see if it was over yet. I pouted and didn't turn around. The dirt was in front of me. It was a spot that I would normally turn and loop down the clean pavement instead but I did not turn. My foot landed down and squished into the wet ground...and there it was. I took another step...and there it was again. My breath. My smile. My joy. Before I knew it I was weaving around branches and puddles...running free!
I do love running. I love it with every fiber of my being. It is a sensation of relief and yet pain...relaxation and yet challenge... A runner is what I have become and it is who I am. I lost myself for a moment there. Now I can breathe again.
Day my life changed: 8/3/2012
- Highest weigh-in to date: 243.5 lbs on 3/11/2008 (Wore 18/20 & 22/24 for a gown)
- As of 8/3/12: 208.6 (wearing size 16/18)
- As of today: 149.0 lbs (wearing size 4-6, XS-S & 26-27 jeans)
Body Fat Percentage
- As of 8/3/12: 46%
- Body Fat %: 21% (Only re-doing every 15th when I take new measurements)
- 134 lbs
- 18% body fat
- Building & toning muscle
- Furthering my yoga practice
- Running with Charity Miles 🙂
- Next Race: RnR DC Marathon & Shamrock Half
- Stroller Warrior “Run the World” Campaign restarted for 2016!
- Morning routine: Run and Weight lifting
- Nightly routine: ITB stretches, crunches, leg lifts, hip extensions, donkey kicks, squats, tricep pushups, pushups and plank
- Welcome to join Will Get Fit…for Cake Fitness Group on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/groups/566678520087780/
- Still logging in my MyFitnessPal! I hit a 1,025 day streak!