Prior to this move, I had put on some weight with lots of strength in my daily. Running had been shorter distances too. Different period in my training, but this… This is all the move. I have backtracked a bit from my goals. The muscle gained is hidden or lost, but I don’t regret this time. There was a lot of laughs, liquor and lunches to be had before I left my circle of friends.
I have big goals set for myself in the future. Now that I have had the chance to step back and reset. It’s time. It’s time to love, cook, praise, run, lift and laugh! Most of all…finding balance for all of it. MyFitnessPal definitely sent a shock wave through me with this picture earlier this morning. This girl, however, has not been around for a while. She was skinny fit. No real muscle tone. No real food freedom. No real happiness. She ran for days…literally. 2016 was the year following a 2,400 miles in one year ran. I do not want her life back. I need more grace than that.
I’m venturing to find something in the middle. Some ground that doesn’t make me a slave to putting what I eat and how much I exercise on a balance. That mindset is too risky for people who have battled an eating disorder before. That mindset never truly goes away. Truth be told…I find the person on the left a lot more beautiful than the one on the right. She’s happy. She just got a new job, had a baby a couple months ago and is in love. The one on the right…her stomach is shrinking but so is her free time and her sanity.
Here’s to finding balance and grace!